


Arachnophilia

by sweetsnow73



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Post-Pacifist Route, Reader presents as feminine, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-08
Updated: 2016-01-08
Packaged: 2018-05-12 12:11:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5665636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetsnow73/pseuds/sweetsnow73
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If you love spiders, isn't only a matter of time before you would run into Muffet? Of course, some things are just fate after all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Arachnophilia

**Author's Note:**

> It goes without saying if you are fearful of spiders you shouldn't be reading this. 
> 
> I was partially inspired to write this because: (1) I wanna smooch the spider lady and (2) Buzz Feed's video “Arachnophobes Meet Spiders” made me realize that you can totally work with tarantulas for a job. Which might be odd inspiration but it works. 
> 
> Since we don’t know a ton about Muffet I'll be using a lot of headcanons and the like, so I hope you enjoy~

**[I. Beginning]**

 

You could say there was a bigger destiny for you, evident from the time you were young. They called you spider whisper. Without thought or much effort you earned the nickname and barely blinked twice about it.

Whenever someone yelled in fear over a spider, you where there cooing to the tiny thing.

Whenever a spider crawled in your shower, you rescued it from a watery death.

Your birthday gifts were books on arachnids or jewelry of webs. At least people thought you were easy to shop for and you simply enjoyed it.

It didn’t take much thought. It's just where your heart led you.

It was no surprise when you got your first tarantula. When you got your third your family was worried but when you started working in movies as a handler they worried a little less.

Yes, it would seem spiders, with their multitude of limbs and eyes just liked you. Liked to watch you and crawl on you. You liked them back, respecting their natures and temperament.

So it was in time no surprise that you stopped in front of the bakery.

Because, as is the way of things. Oddities are fated to meet.

 

 

**[II. Eventuality]**

 

You had to laugh a little, of all the things you could have found taking a new route to work it had to be a bakery. A bakery was was so.... _you_.

The sign was oozing with spider aesthetics with a dash of red roses and elegant penmanship that looked hand painted.

Silver writing on black. Your outfit matched perfectly, an accident predestined considering all your accessories were silver and about 99% of your wardrobe was chic black. A simple life hack that has yet to let you down, since everything will always match.

You had to take a selfie.

You just _had_ to. Baby boomers everywhere may roll their eyes but your instincts have yet to let you down.

You dropped your bag and got a semi blurry picture of the sign, then one of the window decorated in a similar way. The bakery name was in the pictures and you snapped one of you in front of the window. Selfie completed.

  
You texted them to a few friends and slapped them up online.

Some internet addicted friends instantly commented on the pictures, texting back or liking the pictures.

 

‘ _youre home omg’_

 

_'STEALZ IT NOW’_

 

_'ok but is it any good?’_

 

That was a fair question. Your eyes drift to the front door, you pocket the phone and pick up your bag. Sure you should be on your way to work but you were always early. Detours are part of life after all.

The bell rings as you shuffle in. It was unlocked, so you assume it was alright.

Its very pretty. Blood red lace table cloths over black, with matching black chair covers. Flowers and bows decorate the back of the chairs and in vases on the tables. Silver and white break up the interior design and it looks like a gothic Victorian tea party.

A habit you never break made you look up. You gasp and see the spiders crawling around the unlit chandeliers, leaving webs around.

“Sorry we aren’t open just yet~” It was a sweet sounding voice but sounded slightly sultry and wispy. Odd mixture. You hear faint banging noises and some girlish laughter.

They must have been waiting for you to leave but when you didn’t (distracted trying to identify the spider species’ running around) she walked out. You only noticed because the separation curtain from the kitchen and back was moved.

She was only about three or so feet tall, wearing white cloths for baking in.

But oh-

Oh

  
She was _cute_.

  
She was a spider and you slapped yourself in the face. Five eyes blinked.

Six arms and two legs. So tiny. Well, in human terms, for a spider she was huge.

And she had fangs! How _precious_!

“I-…”

You were probably blushing. You felt warm but you hoped your poker face was working.

She was clearly one of those monsters that had come to the surface. She was watching you, you think, its a little hard to tell where her object of focus was. Five eyes and no sclera made it hard to figure it out.

She quickly skitters from behind the counter and towards you. She was quick, two powerful legs closed the gap between you before you blinked twice.

“You smell like spiders, how curious~Ahuhuhu~ ”

There was that laugh again.

You easily had two feet on her, even more in your heels.

You wanted to pick her up and take her home. That would be wrong, keep yourself together.

“Spiders are a girls best friend after all.” You quip, trying to be coy.

She smiles.

 

 

 

You didn’t know it then but she thought you were cute too.

 

**[III. Fairy Tale]**

 

Her name was Muffet and she was a fairly powerful monster that wanted to make life better for spiders. She baked to raise money and support herself since coming to the surface and her goods were fairly popular with monster expat and humans alike. She had two shops and had recently opened in the location you found her at.

When she asked what you did for a living you laughed and tried to be casual, she could either like what you do or hate you instantly.

“I manage acting spiders, I help human actors perform with them and stuff like that.”

The idea that surface spiders were in movies blew her mind. She loved it, perhaps assuming spiders got money for their work. You didn't have the heart to tell her the whole truth. Maybe someday, but for all purposes you took good care of your babies and lived modestly. You saved as much as you could for emergencies, but the idea of her thinking you were using spiders for labor and you profiting off of it became a worry.

A few weeks passed before she came home with you. No, not like that. To see the spiders, of course.

The scheduling problems were at fault for the delay because when you said you took care of tarantulas in your home she wanted to see immediately. She was almost out the door before you talked her down.

She bounced around you as you showed her the way to your place and unlocked the apartment door. She ducked in under you and was _excited_.

Your babies got energized when they saw her. They shuffled around and almost seemed to reach for her. Maybe it made you a little jealous. She cooed from the other side of the tank glass.

“Your dwelling is most pleasant~”

She walked around with one of your tarantulas in hand, seemed to be examining everything. From your table, to your book case jammed with scientific research books, to your vanity and bedroom.

You weren’t too worried about her finding embarrassing stuff.

You checked your phone from time to time between answering the questions she yelled from the other room. She was taking her time and you didn't care to rush her.

 

_'oH MY GOD THE SPIDER LADY IS REALLY AT YOUR PLACE!?’_

 

One of your close friends was texting you, wanting a play by play. You've been telling them about Muffet for a while now.

 

_'yes’_

 

_'ARE YOU GONNA SMOOCH HER?’_

 

You might have wanted to but had no idea if she wanted to. Technically that would be rather fast moving, in terms of relationships...

The fangs alone would get in the way...

You are in too deep already if you were worried about interspecies logistics.

 

_'SMOOCH HER OR IM COMING OVER AND SMASHIN UR FACES 2GETHER’_

 

You chock back a laugh because, yes they really would.

The next three text messages were nothing but _'kiss the spider’_ over and over.

Your friend was the most aggressive absent wingman in the world. They were probably just frantically typing on their phone while lounging in Pjs and eating ice cream.

You slammed your phone face down on the coffee table when you heard Muffet walk back in.

“Human, it has come to my attention that you think I’m cute.” She had a habit of every smile looking predatory. You glance down at the phone then at her, then at the fuzzy tarantula nestled on her shoulder.

TRAITOR OF THE FUZZIEST KIND. Of course she could actually talk to them, all your secrets were probably spilled. That’s the last time you talk in the living room about people you find cute.

 

She put the traitor back in the tank and practically pounced next to you on the couch. That part was still odd, not the five eyes or abundant limbs, but the way she cared nothing for closing distances at a reasonable speed.

“I find that curious, I am the only monster boss spider but you could reproduce with any human. It's illogical that you find me attractive.”

  
Who said anything about reproduction? You hadn’t thought about kids in years and that was only to be thankful that you can be the coolest babysitter in town. Mostly to the kids unafraid of spiders, they loved to have a fuzzy tarantula sit on their heads…

You shook your head.

“Look this isn’t about….any of that,” you gesture in a circular motion for some reason it reminded you of infants but it might not have crossed the species barrier, “its about, I guess, just that you are cute to me. You are sweet, it’s, I dont know, simpler than that? Maybe just an aesthetic thing? I don't know, I don't worry about it, you shouldn't either.”

It was complicated. You wanted her to worry about and maybe like you back or something?

She thinks about it, crawling up the back of the couch, sitting so she’s taller than you. She likes the height advantage.

“Alright~ Ahuhuhu~”

The issue is dropped and your relationship keeps its course. Surprisingly unaffected by this revelation.  
But as is the way of things, when two pieces of a puzzle fit, they tend to stay together.

 

**[IV. Magic]**

 

You’ve come to find that her spiders at the shop are an underground species that no longer have direct family with surface spiders. Some distant cousins but the populations diverged eons ago. They seem to regard Muffet as some kind of queen/mother/sister hybrid. She used to be small like them but she was most aggressive and grew. She fought and gained strength and for her species that means she got to be big and in charge. This seemed to be a rare event, there hasn't been another in a very long time.

She finds your baby pictures to be a novelty worth looking at.

Human children had fallen into the underground before but she only saw the one called Frisk. Like most monsters, the idea that humans age so quickly was odd.

“I just got bigger, it's what humans do under the best of circumstances…”

“But this growth is unsustainable!”

You smile.

“That’s why we stop after a point.”

She looks at you and taps her face. You got a body check and she nodded.

“Interesting. I too have stopped growing. Despite increased strength.”

She was disappointed and you wondered who she was fighting.

“Are you a strong human?~”

She asked suddenly. She casually flips the album pages.

“Not particularly.”

“So is that why you wear those heighted shoes?”

You glance at her feet and her tiny Mary Jane styled shoes. Flats.

“No I just like them…”

“Not as a power display or to attract mates? I know of a mechanical man that wears them for such purposes.”

The image of the tin man from the Wizard of Oz in stilettos pops into your mind and you can’t help but giggle.

She is confused but waits for an explanation.

“No, no…I mean good luck to him, but people and machines, wear them for different reasons. I just think they look nice.”

She thinks again, closing the album and nods in approval.

“Then perhaps they only coincidentally make your legs and bottom look attractive~”

Your brain tries to unravel that all night.

But foolishly you kept returning to the hope that she really did mean to say it the way you took it, because that means she was looking.

  
**…**

 

She gives you a bracelet made of webs with tiny coins used as beads. She ties it on and proudly smiles. The web is strong and it looked as if tiny bites had punctured holes in the strange underground currency. She had surface money now and couldn’t really use the now defunct coins.

She made it herself and you cried a little. Only a little.

  
_Okay, a lot._

That was the first time you hugged. She was light, fuzzy and smelled like the bakery.

 

 

You didn’t know it then but she thought you smelled like home and were the perfect amount of warmth.

 

She felt safe in your arms.

 

**[V. Connected]**

 

You've been in fights before. Mostly because you followed your impulses and it worked out well. You've been lucky.

So really when you caught the middle aged man getting ready to throw a rock through the bakery window its no surprise that you strike out with a punch. You just let it happen, like a stream of water following gravity.

You toss the rock in his direction when you finally scare him off. He was all bark and no bite, he was a opportunistic predator. Lazy even in hatred. You yell obscenities at his retreating form and hopefully ran him off for good.

You probably storm into the shop, flinging the door open a little too roughly for the delicate bell.

You hear the familiar skittering noise and see Muffet on the counter in her baking clothing.

She’s confused, blinking and wanting some explanation for your rare outburst of anger.

You wave it off and sit at your usual seat. She sits across from you, flour in her dark hair and across her face.

One of her spiders drops from the ceiling and you know what’s coming.

She listens to a voice too tiny for you to hear and the tiny spider crawls away.

She’s looking at you. Now you were better at understanding her glances.

“Thank you-”

“No, no don’t start that. You are…,” no wait, “I just,” wait that’s not right either, “I like whooping some ass, you know that.” You punch a fist into your free hand and try to look imposing and powerful. You regret it because that was the fist you used on the man and it hurts. You shake it out and chuckle.

You play it off as calmly as possible, casually looking out the window.

When you look back she's on the table in front of you with a grin. Instead of being slightly creepy, it was sweet.

She kisses you softly.

  
…

 

_'ABOUT TIME U SMOOCHED OMG’_

 

_'SHE TASTED LIKE YEASTY DONUTS'_

 

_'lol u screwed’_

 

  
You didn’t know it then but you’d get to share so many more kisses and you would try to count them all.

 

But like the interconnecting points on a web, they seemed endless.

 

 


End file.
